having loved then lost...

When I woke up this morning I had a feeling this wouldn't be a typical day... and I was right.

There are some things you can't change in your life, and some things you can. Pleasing everyone is one of those things. Sometimes you just can't make everyone happy, no matter how much you wish you could.

You also can't change yourself for someone and you can't expect someone to change for you. You can only hope they would want to do right by you and make you happy with the things they do.

I don't have all the answers. I'm learning more and more about "me" everyday. One thing I do know is that I have self respect and I know when to say no and when I will not give in. I know the situations that make me uncomfortable and I also know when someone is taking advantage of me. I guess realizing that you are strong is the first hurdle of the battle.

Regardless of how much I want something in my life, if it's not the right time, it's just not the right time. One of my best friends told me, in not so few words, that I have to put myself out there to get the reward in the end. That I have to trust that the next thing will be bigger and better than the last. She told me that I'm worth it and that when I feel that someone has put me down I can stand up with my head held high and know that I didn't do anything wrong in the situation and that I am a better person for having learned from them. There is nothing wrong with loving with your whole heart and losing in the end.

The saying goes, "It's better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all."
The saying is true. I guess I'm just a bit tired of losing.

Oh well... off to the next adventure... want to come? :)

Who I am...

I have a lot to learn about myself and life.

I have a lot to learn about making myself happy and not giving a crap what other people think of me.

I have a lot to learn about being honest with my friends and not worrying about what they will think because if they are a true friend they are going to be happy for me regardless of the decision I make.

I have a lot to learn about life... and I'm learning more and more every day. I hope everyone can accept that and be happy for me because I'm really, really happy with my life and the decisions I've made of late.

The confusion is there because I'm worried about what you all think... but it's slowly subsiding because I know regardless of what happens, my true friends will have my back.

I love my true friends. :)